Fly or Die?

fly or die

Thursday, February 19, 2004
Do I have masochistic tendencies? June and Mila were already there when I made it to Coffee Bean. The only way to redeem myself, they said, is if I told them everything. Everything. That's the problem with girlfriends - they don't let you off the hook easy. "So?" they asked. The interrogation started as soon as I settled on the chair. I was prepared for June to slam a gun on the table and for Mila to pull my hair back to get me to confess. The only thing missing was the lamp shining into my eyes. "It was okay," I shrugged, trying to downplay the whole episode. "What do you mean 'okay'?" June gets into form, "The guy blows bucks on a fully decorated tank and you say it is 'okay'?" "Hey, cool it," I said and checked her belt to see whether she really has a gun. "Don't you dare leave out details or we're through, baby!" Mila chipped in. Did I mention that they are my best friends? How did that ever happen? "I don't know what to say!" I defended myself, "We ate, we talked. And that was it." "Liar!" June muttered. "You're in love, aren't you?" "No. I'm not, really. Honest!" I said. "Liar!" June repeated. "He's nice but I just don't ... well, you know." "No, we DON'T know," Mila jumped at me. "I don't feel that we're right for each other. We have nothing in common. We talk about nothing but work, work, work." "My God, are you mental?" June started, and slaps her hand on her forehead. "Huh?" "Where can you find such a nice guy? You like fish, he buys tank. You like Japanese, he takes you out for dinner. He'll give you the moon if you wanted," June concluded. "But that's exactly the problem,"I said. She throws her arms in the air and shakes her head. "Why?" Mila starts her round. "This attention ... it's overwhelming. He's ... he's ... trying too hard. It's not real, not ... er ... normal?" "It isn't supposed to be NORMAL!" Mila screamed. "HE'S-IN-LOVE-WITH-YOU. Duh." Mila mouths it slow-mo for the benefit of a retard like me. "The way I see it - it's just gonna go all the way downhill from here. In 10 years time, he probably won't even take the garbage out." This time Mila shakes her head. I'm a masochistic idiot, they think. Pencil chewed at 12:15:00 pm //
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